El Paso Half Marathon

I am not really sure where to start here so I will begin with the drive down to El Paso, TX from Las Cruces, NM. Brianne had been planning on doing the El Paso half marathon for quite some time but I was not sure if I was ready to race that far. Then after thinking about some other race option (including the Hillsboro Bike Classic which I really wanted to do but would have had my ass handed to me) I concluded that the El Paso half marathon was my best bet. I guess what I just said has nothing to do with driving down to El Paso so let me start again. Sorry.

The afternoon before the race Becca Gavin, Brianne Loya, and I drove down to El Paso to enjoy some quad ripping and blister popping fun. We picked up our packets at the Double Tree Hotel and made our way to Brianne's house. Thanks to Brianne's Papa, I got a chance to finally eat a nutritious meal of BBQ chicken, rice and grilled sweet potatoes. After dinner we rented a movie, watched it, then went to bed. It was a riveting absolutely energy packed Saturday night.

Race morning dawned and I ate some peanut butter on bread, a slice of leftover French bread from dinner and I think a banana but I'm not sure. Nothing heavy because I still felt rather full from dinner. I was hoping I would get a chance to take a big poo before the race so I wouldn't have to stop once we got rolling. However, I had decided not to push myself to the max unless I felt really really good and I was over half way done with the run. With this mindset I was not nervous at all because I was looking at it as a nice quality long Sunday run. In turn, not being nervous, I was not sure I could get my "dump truck" dumped and empty before the start. Plus I did not get any pre-race coffee so that was not going to help speed things up. That being said I did get a semi-decent "unloading" but I still didn't feel right. I was hoping I was wrong and that the rapidly approaching race would be smooth sailing all the way.

I started off with a slow jog excited to finally be under way. I ran through the first mile but still didn't feel very warmed up. I slowly tried to pick up the pace but I was just feeling worse and more stiff. I wanted to stop and stretch out so incredibly bad and try and take a poo again thinking that might be why I was feeling so awful. I was hardly breathing and I'm sure my heart rate was like 110. I was not working hard, I just couldn't get my feet to come off the ground. I kept slowing the pace back down trying to loosen up and not hurt myself. A couple people passed me back between miles 3 and 6 or so but never got too far ahead. I felt like I (and I probably was) running so slow. I was also starting to get frustrated. After the 10k mark the road leveled off and passed underneath an overpass. There were a half dozen cops sitting at the intersection and I asked which way to go. One of them replied,"Half marathoners left, marathoners right." Not really feeling up for the full marathon, I chose left.

Finally the rolling hills were behind me and I could start to relax. The few guys I was running with started to fall back and my legs were slowly loosening up. Why does it take me so long to feel like I am actually running instead of working? Anyway, I could feel my stride lengthen and my cadence pick up. About 3 minutes up the road I could see a police car and two runners running side by side behind it. Wow! was I really in third place? And I thought I was out of shape. HA!!! Instantly images of me slowly catching the two leaders jumped into my head and I thought for a moment I could actually win! After peeling off some decent miles the leaders were not really getting any closer. I saw Brianne on the opposite side of the road and hollered an encouraging word.

Now I'm at mile 11 and looking behind me. I can't see anyone behind me and know I will not be caught. But I'm also not going to catch the leaders. I take a couple of short mental pauses and jog through the last water station. I finished feeling very strong and smiling like a little kid wearing flannel pajamas on Christmas morning. I had just obliterated my old half marathon PR and felt like I could have run much much faster. But remember when I turned left? Of course you do...Yeah...That was wrong. I shaved off probably 1/2 to 3/4 of a mile by doing so. The race director apologized for THEIR mistake and then promptly disqualified me from the El Paso Half Marathon. But wait! Hold onto your shorts! There is a happy ending here after all. So many people cut the course where I did (I'd estimate 30%) the race director made a special category just for us cheaters. I had just won the El Paso half marathon short course! Pretty exciting...Sigh...Okay not really.

But all is not lost. Brianne on the other hand got third over all and won her age division! Brianne is so amazingly fast! I bet if she were to stop wasting her time eating honey, oatmeal, cinnamon, and sweeping her rug and making cake pyramids she would win every race. But in actuality, looking at the results, Brianne did not really win her age division or get third over all. Sorry Brianne. The whole race was one giant disaster. So many people cheated and were technically screwed out of their award and some of those who did not cheat technically were given awards they did not deserve. It's fair, I'm not complaining, cheaters should never be awarded. I just wish those stupid police officers who told us to go left, get their eyebrows shaven off or something.